


Golden Strand, Destined Chance

by twinflamedfest



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-14
Updated: 2018-11-14
Packaged: 2019-08-23 14:14:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16620563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twinflamedfest/pseuds/twinflamedfest
Summary: written by hunhanthusiast





	Golden Strand, Destined Chance

**Author's Note:**

> written by hunhanthusiast

 

 

_Some people live their live in full bliss - a life full of glitters and golds, sparkles and shines. Some people live their lives in pains and sufferings - a hand on their neck, razors on their wrists, and their future blurry. Some live their lives in full regrets - an endless feeling of anguish, an endless cycle of blaming themselves, wondering about things that could have been and should have happened, the if onlys and what ifs._

 

“Yes, yes, I’ll show up, don’t worry. I’ll come on time too. No, you don’t need to pick me up, I can go there alone, Baekhyun. Yes, tell Kyungsoo I said hi, I’m hanging up now, goodbye, Baekkie”

 

And without any second thought, Luhan swiped the end call option. He stared at the picture on his lock screen, a picture of him and his two stubborn best friends. He heaved a sigh. Luhan always have a soft spot for his friends. He always has time to spend for them and with them. Being a shy and timid person that he is, Luhan only have a few people he knows he can trust and rely on to - his friends. Baekhyun is his best friend and Kyungsoo, too. They are a trio since middle school. They are inseparable. They literally saw and witnessed everything that had happened to each other since the time they agreed to stick together during the orientation back in middle school.

 

Luhan and Kyungsoo witnessed how Baekhyun grieved over his first goldfish which died two days after because of overfeeding. Luhan and Baekhyun witnessed how devastated Kyungsoo looked when their culinary arts teacher told him his cake was subpar to that of everyone’s in the class. Luhan and Kyungsoo witnessed how Baekhyun cried over his rejected business plan too which their professor deemed too unrefined. Luhan witnessed how Baekhyun and Kyungsoo found their partners and Baekhyun and Kyungsoo witnessed how Luhan had lost the person he loved all at once.

 

But Luhan now deemed the latter as an unimportant memory to relive. What’s done is done. The past should be kept the way they are. Sure, there are things that ended pretty roughly and unexpectedly but what’s important is that he had learned from every of them. That’s what he keep in mind to continue breathing after painful experiences.

 

After 10 years of graduating from Seoul National University, Luhan’s now a professional pastry chef alongside Kyungsoo who’s now working as a sous chef in the restaurant Baekhyun is managing. His friends got a pretty, stable life now and Luhan’s happy for them. Sure they are both a handful, always insisting that he already need to find someone he wants to grow old with and setting him on a blind date from time to time. But Luhan doesn’t really care about it, he’s happy living alone in his house together with his cat.

 

Tomorrow’s a special day. It was their college batch’s reunion. So, Luhan’s now a man on a mission - find a proper suit for tomorrow or anything he can wear. He continue walking down the street that leads to the city’s department store.

 

Upon arriving at the said store, Luhan head straight to the restroom to fix his self up. He removed his beanie hat, revealing his hair that’s now quite a mess. Luhan ran his fingers through it, a plain attempt at fixing it.

 

“How old are you, young man?” someone from behind Luhan asked him. He clutched his chest, shocked to find out that someone’s inside too except him despite the restroom being so quiet, and turned around only to find an old man staring at his hair.

 

Luhan faked a smile, not wanting to be rude to the old man though deep inside he wants to scream, “Good evening, ahjussi, I’m already on my 30s”

 

“Oh, I can’t figure that out” the old man remarked

 

“Why?” Luhan chuckled, “do I look that young?”

 

“Hmm, that and because you don’t have that gold hair yet”

 

“Oh,” Luhan reached out for his hair and examined the strands on his hand, and sighed (unconsciously) when he realized that what the ahjussi had told him is true. He don’t have those strands of golden hair yet, whether he’ll be having them sometime from now or never, he doesn’t know.

 

But why is it a big deal anyway?

 

It’s because in the time and place where Luhan lives in, the golden hair strand is an indication that you have already met your soulmate, that one person you are bound to live with your life forever. It starts to appear when one reaches the ripe age of 24, and only when you came face-to-face with your soulmate will one has his hair glowing a vibrant gold color. But what happens when one was busy walking down the streets the previous night or the moment his hair turned gold? The answer is simple, you just have to go back to the place where you had been and you’ll find that person again, also searching for you. _Well, that’s what the elders say._ They also said that if you haven’t met your soulmate at the age of 30, there’s a high possibility that you won’t ever meet him/her.

 

“But don’t give up, young man” the ahjussi spoke, breaking Luhan’s train of thoughts, “who knows? You might get lucky tonight” he continued, a smile appearing on his lips, “I met mine when I was 34, we’re now celebrating our 46th year of being together”

 

“Oh, congratulations, ahjussi” Luhan replied, a smile also gracing his lips, “where is she?” Luhan asked him.

 

The old man just smiled at him and said, “she’s waiting for me - to come home. I’ll be going ahead now, uh, what’s your name, son?”

 

“It’s Luhan, ahjussi”

 

“Oh, I’ll be going ahead now, Luhan, I still have a place to visit” and Luhan finally understood what the ahjussi meant when he said that his wife is waiting for him to come home. And Luhan can’t stop his heart from aching as he watched the old man’s back starting to get further and further away.

 

Luhan left the restroom right after the old man had gone out of his sight. He head straight to the clothing department and look for a suit that he can wear for tomorrow night’s event. There are a wide variety of suits that he can choose from. Starting from the simple coat and tie without any intricate designs to the coat and tie that is finely crafted and woven to please the eyes of the customers, and the colors from blue to maroon and white to black.

 

Luhan scanned the coats and tested how the cloths feel on his hands and stopped at a particular suit. It was black in color, adorned with gold patterns at the top part and with just one look he knows that it will fit him perfectly so he decided to get it. He asked for assistance and was asked to fit it in the fitting room. After changing, Luhan looked at his reflection in the mirror - the suit really does fit him perfectly.

 

He left the store, the suit neatly folded in the paper bag he was holding. He dropped by his favorite pastry shop before going to buy the blueberry cheesecake he was craving to eat the whole day. After doing so, he exited the department store.

 

The crisp and cold air was what welcomed Luhan when he stepped outside. He put on his beanie hat back and fixed his jacket, clutching it close to his body. Luhan likes the winter season but he hates how cold the nights can get sometimes. Luhan take a good look around him. The lamp posts are already decorated with glowing lights and ribbons and candy canes. Christmas trees lined up the street and the snow mantled their leaves. The city turned into a winter wonderland. A group of children are singing Christmas carols across the street. Luhan smiled.

 

Realizing that he already need to start walking or he’ll freeze up, Luhan started taking baby steps towards his humble abode. He walked towards the pedestrian lane for he needs to cross the street to be able to ride a bus. The signal’s light is on red, making Luhan wait for a few more seconds before he finally got to cross. He took his time walking, not wanting to be like the people around him who are all moving at a fast pace, seeming to be afraid to miss out on something important. He took his time walking for there isn’t something important that he’s afraid to miss out on. He took his time walking and when he reached the middle of the road, he stopped in his trance.

 

For right in front of him, at the other part of the road, at the bus stop he needs to go to,  is someone who used to be most important thing in his life.

 

_Oh Sehun._

The man is clad in his office attire with a gray sweater on top of it to keep him warm,a black scarf wrapped around his neck. The man hasn’t noticed him yet for he’s too engrossed at talking with someone on the phone - his special person maybe for he’s smiling like he just won the lotto.

 

Luhan doesn’t know how, and certainly he doesn’t know why too, but looking at Sehun’s happy face 10 years after has his heart aching too much. There’s this pang he’s feeling that’s too strong to be ignored. What does that mean, Luhan doesn’t want to know. Or more precisely, Luhan is afraid to know.

 

Staring at the man standing approximately 10 steps away from him, Luhan’s now debating whether to continue crossing the street or to turn around, go back to where he came from, miss the next bus and wait for another 10 minutes or more.

 

*****

 

“Yes, Mom, I’ll make it to dinner. Don’t worry, I’m currently waiting for the bus, it should be here anytime soon. No, I didn’t go out on a date, I just got out of work, mom. And no, there’s no one I’m currently interested with”

 

Sehun loves talking to his mom and the idea of coming home to her cooked food every Friday. Though busy managing the architectural firm, Sehun makes sure that he comes home every Friday night to spend time with his family. The firm is closed during weekends anyway because Sehun doesn’t want to overwork his employees. Above all others, Sehun prioritizes the well-being of his employees.

 

After asking Sehun about lots of things and nagging at him, his mom suddenly went quiet on the other line so he started to worry.

 

“Mom, are you still there?”

 

“Oh, yes, yes, sweetheart” Sehun noticed how off his mom sounded when she said that.

 

Voice laced with worrying, he asked, “Mom, is there any problem?”  


“Oh, nothing, sweetheart. I just want you to be honest with me, it’s been years since you last introduced someone to us and after you two broke up, you didn’t date anyone. Are you scared of trying again?”

Sehun bowed his head, the numbing ache in his chest every time the past is being brought up resurfacing again.

 _I’m scared of not being with the guy you’re referring to, Mom._ Sehun wanted to tell his mom.

 

It’s foolish of him to still feel longing for the same person who had broken his heart and thrown their years of being together away when he left him 10 years ago. He knows he has his fair share of the reason why they broke up too but it doesn’t stop him from hurting. Sehun tried moving on, he really did but every time he tried going out with someone that is not Luhan, he can feel his stomach churning. Maybe he just loved him too much, that every memories they had made were already etched on his mind and engraved on his heart - memories that are not easy to forget, memories that cannot be replaced and no other memories can surpass.

 

“I just haven’t found anyone who have caught my interest, Mom” Sehun replied, lifting his head up, looking straight ahead.

 

_Badum. Badum._

His crazy heart goes. Beating frantically at the sight of the person in front of him - Luhan.

 

The guy has the same expression as his - surprise. Sehun didn’t expect this to happen at the very least, meeting Luhan at the busy street of Seoul. He didn’t expect to meet the person he and his mom has been talking about minutes ago. The person whose name is enough to make his heart ache, and now, the person whose presence is enough to make him feel different waves of emotions.

 

He watched as Luhan stood there in the middle of the pedestrian lane and as he is currently being bumped by other people who are crossing the streets too.

 

Absentmindedly, Sehun extended his left hand.

 

******

Sehun saw him already. He too was shocked much like how Luhan is. Who would have thought that after 10 years of not seeing each other and hearing news about the other, they’re now here, getting lost at each other’s gazes, both waiting for their current scene to unfold and looking forward to where it will take them?

 

Luhan stood there, frozen, his body losing its mobility but when Sehun extended his hand, his body started functioning again. Long before he realized it, he’s already walking again, crossing the streets again and ended up beside Sehun.

 

*****

Sehun watched as Luhan started walking, his every steps closing the distance between them. All he can see is Luhan. Despite the number of busy people walking down the street that time, the vehicles passing by on the other side of the street, Luhan is all that he can see. It’s like watching a theatrical play, and the spotlight is directed at Luhan only, making him the only visible person on stage that time. Sehun’s heart pounds louder every time Luhan took a step towards him. When Luhan’s already an arm length away from him, Sehun’s world stopped turning. When Luhan is already standing next to him, Sehun started feeling dizzy, his heart anticipating what is yet to come.

 

“It’s been a long time” Luhan suddenly said.

 

Sehun looked at him, and Luhan also directed his gaze to him. They zeroed their gaze at each other, both recognizing something in the way the other’s eyes look like that moment - there is longing, happiness and pain.

 

“It is” Sehun replied.

Luhan was the first one to look away, breaking their intense staring contest. The bus stopped right that moment and he immediately went aboard, not even waiting for Sehun.

 

“I miss you” Sehun mumbled, gaze still trained at the spot where Luhan was at seconds ago.

 

Luhan sat at the farthest seat, immediately occupying the seat beside the window, making it possible for him to still see Sehun. Luhan clutched his aching chest.

 

A lot of people are already boarding the bus too, and Sehun is still there, not even moving an inch. The doors of the bus are already closing and Sehun still remained standing there, looking completely lost in his thoughts.

_Why?_ Luhan asked himself, _why am I disappointed? Why am I afraid that this will be the last time I’ll be seeing bim?_

“You’re not coming, kid?” Luhan heard the conductor shouted, his question directed at Sehun. Sehun moved then, boarding the bus Luhan is in.

 

*****

 

When Luhan left him at the bus stop, Sehun was reminded of the past - the memories he tried so hard to suppress and not remember again. He remembered the awful night Luhan left him at the cafe. He remembered the awful night Sehun lost the only person he had loved and is loving until now.

 

_*****_

_“Let’s break up, Luhan” the man sitting at the seat opposite to him said, his voice weary. Luhan dropped the spoon he was using to stir his cup of coffee. The person in front of him who used to be like his coffee, warm and soothing, is now as cold as the ice floating at the orange juice he had long stopped drinking. Luhan dreaded for this day to come. He knows this is about to happen but he isn’t expecting it to be this soon._

_“Why?” he mustered up some courage to ask, for what? He doesn’t know. To answer his questions? Probably. To know where he went wrong? Could be. To break his heart more? Surely._

_“Because I’m already tired. I’m not meant to be your sometimes, Lu. I don’t deserve to be cast aside and to be thrown at the sidelines most of the time. You don’t -”_

_“I don’t deserve you, is that it? After all I’ve done for you, the sacrifices I did for the both of us, I still don’t deserve you” Luhan spat and scoffed at Sehun seconds after, “yep, I don’t deserve you. But not because of the things you had mentioned. Do you know why, Sehun? It’s because I deserve someone else. Someone who’s willing to understand me and the situations I am in and continue being put to. I don’t deserve someone like you for I deserve someone better” Luhan smiled, a sad one, at Sehun and stood up. He turned his back on Sehun and declared, “goodbye Oh Sehun, I am hoping I’ll never have to see you again, not in this lifetime or the next”_

_Luhan started walking away. His heart full of hatred, regret and most of all, pain. He tried to maintain his composure and stopped himself from shedding a tear, not in front of the guy who broke him for that will only give the other a much more satisfaction on being the cause for Luhan’s heartbreak._

_Sehun just watched him. Luhan’s words completely stunning him and stopping him from uttering a word. Why did I even said that? He asked himself. It was wrong. Blaming Luhan is wrong but then his pent up emotions and the feeling of being only an option and not a choice ate him out alive._

_Maybe it was real that some emotions are too strong that they ate the characters out - making them do things that they never realized would make them feel the regret that they had felt when the outcomes were already presented and laid out in front of them. And Sehun learned that the hard and painful way._

_He lost Luhan - the only person who gives him happiness. He lost the only person he knows he’ll be loving in his life. Sehun wasn’t exaggerating, he knows no one will be able to replace Luhan in his heart, not when he promised his self that Luhan’s gonna be the only one he will love. Not when he had vowed that Luhan will be the one to wear the ring he’s been saving up for some time now. Even despite the fights they had been into for the past month, Sehun is still sure that Luhan will be the only one._

_So why did he let him go? Because he knows what Luhan said is right - Luhan deserves better. He deserves someone who’s not as petty as Sehun. He deserves someone who can be mature enough to deal with frustrations and mature enough to not find fault at the situation they are in. Luhan deserves someone who can understand that although they are in a relationship, the other has a life to live too , a world that doesn’t only revolve around his partner, something Sehun wasn’t able to do because he’s too busy being a kid who acts on his emotions rather than being a man who acts on rational thoughts._

_*****_

“You’re not coming, kid?” the conductor shouted, his question directed at Sehun. Sehun moved then, boarding the bus Luhan is in.

 

He walked towards the back, looking for a vacant seat, all the while looking for a glimpse of Luhan. He spotted a vacant seat at the back, and a familiar orange beanie hat. He walked towards it and situated himself there uncomfortably. He glanced at the guy sitting beside him. Luhan has his gaze trained outside, his fingertips drumming the glass window. The silence is deafening but Sehun is afraid to speak. He is afraid Luhan doesn’t want to do anything with him and just ignore him. His heart isn’t ready for that - not yet.

 

Minutes after the ride started, Luhan started to feel sleepy. He keeps on yawning for some time now. A day at work, satisfying the hungry customers with his baked pastries, and an hour and more spent at the department store looking around for suit to wear tomorrow, and then bumping into Sehun, had drained all the energy he has. His eyes are now starting to close, his head leaning on the bus’ glass window, ready to fall asleep, but he’s willing himself not to, afraid that he’ll miss his stop if he did so.

 

“Where’s your stop?” Sehun asked him.

 

“The 12th street” he answered. He then felt a hand on his right cheek and he then felt his head coming in contact with Sehun’s shoulder.

 

“We’re still on the 3rd street, go get some sleep, I’ll wake you up when we get there” Sehun coaxed him, and Luhan did just that. He closed his eyes, Sehun’s scent filling up his sense.

 

Minutes after Luhan fell asleep, Sehun felt something wetting his shoulder - it wasn’t drool. It’s Luhan’s tears. _Why is he crying?_ Sehun asked himself.

 

Sehun brushed Luhan’s fringes away, then stared at the perfection now sleeping beside him.

 

“I missed you,” Sehun whispered, his eyes getting misty, “if you only knew how hard it had been without you” knowing that Luhan’s a heavy sleeper, Sehun placed a chaste kiss on the latter’s head.

 

“I wanted to ran after you that night, and stop you from leaving me, but if I do that, I’ll only hurt you more. I am unstable. I easily get jealous, I’m possessive, and I only think about myself. Looking back, there had been so many times that I stopped you from doing something that you badly wanted to do because I’m afraid of being apart from you. And that’s wrong of me. I am acting like a child who’s afraid of getting his favorite toy away from him. I should have trusted you. I should have known better. I should have shown you how much you mean to me. You are right, Lu, you deserve someone better”

 

And Sehun broke down.

 

***

Luhan is really sleepy but he didn’t dare to get some sleep even though being in Sehun’s presence is very comfortable. He didn’t for he’s afraid that this will be the last chance to be with Sehun that he will be getting. He wanted to remember every moment. So he just remained there, his eyes closed and his tears freely flowing from his eyes. He felt Sehun brushed his fringes away, he just continue pretending that he is already sleeping and maybe, this was the best decision he had made so far.

 

“I missed you,” he heard Sehun whisper, “if you only knew how hard it had been without you” then he felt Sehun placed a chaste kiss on the his head.

 

Luhan’s heart is now swelling with so much emotions. He can feel his eyes now crying more tears. Sehun missed him. Sehun had a hard time without him. The Sehun he is with right now is still the Sehun who loved him before.

 

“I wanted to ran after you that night, and stop you from leaving me, but if I do that, I’ll only hurt you more. I am unstable. I easily get jealous, I’m possessive, and I only think about myself. Looking back, there had been so many times that I stopped you from doing something that you badly wanted to do because I’m afraid of being apart from you. And that’s wrong of me. I am acting like a child who’s afraid of getting his favorite toy away from him. I should have trusted you. I should have known better. I should have shown you how much you mean to me. You are right, Lu, you deserve someone better”

 

 _I went back for you that night,_ Luhan wanted to tell Sehun, _I went back but you were gone already. I want to take back what I said, I didn’t mean them. I love you and you’re the only one who deserve me._

“Sehun,” Luhan blurted out, unconsciously, and he felt the need to smack himself right that moment but he didn’t. He continue pretending that he was asleep.

 

“See, even in your sleep, I am making you cry,” Sehun laughed dryly, “when will I be able to make you happy?”

 

Sehun remained mum after that, but Luhan can hear him sniffing. Luhan badly wanted to open his eyes and look at him but he didn’t for that will only make the situation awkward.

 

Minutes after, Luhan felt Sehun shaking him gently.

 

“Lu, wake up, we’re already here” Luhan opened his eyes slowly and rubbed them after. He fake-yawned a few times and put on his sleepy look.

 

“Thank you” he told Sehun. He looked at him and Sehun’s eyes are misty and his nose is red too. He cried, that Luhan is sure of, “are you okay?” he asked him.

 

“Oh, yes, I am, take care okay?” Sehun lied and tried forcing a smile on his lips.

 

“Sure, you too,” Luhan stood up and picked up his things, “it was nice seeing you again, Sehun”

 

“Same here” Luhan smiled at him and started walking away, leaving Sehun once again. Sehun watched as Luhan exited the bus and walked towards his place. This moment, Sehun had thought, is the second most agonizing thing that had happened in his life.

 

****

Luhan stopped in his trance after entering the dimly-lit street. The bus Sehun is in is now leaving and seconds after, it was already gone. Luhan’s knees weakened and he sat on the cold pavement, hugging his knees close to his chest. He misses Sehun already and he’s hoping this wouldn’t be the last time he will be seeing the latter. Not when he knows Sehun is hurting because of him much as like how he is hurting because of Sehun.

 

Regaining his strength once more, Luhan walked towards his apartment.

 

_Some people live their live in full bliss - a life full of glitters and golds, sparkles and shines. Some people live their lives in pains and sufferings - a hand on their neck, razors on their wrists, and their future blurry. Some live their lives in full regrets - an endless feeling of anguish, an endless cycle of blaming themselves, wondering about things that could have been and should have happened, the if onlys and what ifs._

 

_Sehun and Luhan’s lives are the latter._

***

The next day, Luhan woke up with bloodshot eyes and a snotty nose. It was already 3 pm. And the reunion is at 5 pm. If he doesn’t want to be late, he needs to start moving now. He wasn’t able to sleep well after that encounter with Sehun. He kept on hearing Sehun’s voice. He kept on hearing how the latter sounded so broken while confessing to a ‘sleeping’ him. He badly wanted to see Sehun, but Luhan doesn’t know where he is.

 

 _How is it possible?,_ he asked himself, _to still feel the same way for the same guy you haven’t seen nor heard about for 10 years. How is it possible to still love the person who showed you how awful that feeling can get._ Luhan doesn’t know but if there’s something that he’s sure about, it is that he still love Sehun. No matter how impossible it may seem, no matter how much he had told everyone that he had already moved on, he still loves Sehun. It’s as if the feelings he has for Sehun are there all this time and he was just afraid to let them show so he shut them all out and when he saw Sehun, he just can’t stop himself from letting them resurface again.

 

Luhan stared at his disheveled reflection at the mirror. He ruffled his hair and after doing so, he blinked his eyes multiple times, rubbing the sleepiness out of it. He picked up the paper bag he was holding yesterday and took out the suit, laying it on his bed, alongside the things he’ll be needing to use later. Luhan got his bath robe and went inside the bathroom. He let the cold water trickle down his body, letting the cold water ease him. Minutes later, the strawberry and vanilla scent filled the bathroom as Luhan put his strawberry-scented shampoo on his hair and lathered his loofa with his vanilla-scented body wash. He cleaned himself with it and spent a good time scrubbing himself. He rinsed himself and remained standing under the shower head. The water running down his body is cold, but the tears staining his cheeks aren’t. He’s crying once more, and soon, he’s sure that he’ll be going crazy.

 

Clad in his bathroom robe, he exited the bathroom 30 minutes later. He had already calmed down, the ache he is feeling in his chest now dissipating. He prepped himself up for the party later. He applied a good amount of concealer on the dark circles under his eyes and hid his blemishes although there’s not much to hide. He applied a good amount of foundation on his face and accented his eyes with black eyeliner. He put on lip balm on his thin lips and stared at his reflection in the mirror. He looks good but his eyes, although looking much more beautiful than before, are sad. His eyes don’t have their usual glow, his eyes don’t have their usual sparkle. Luhan sighed.

 

He changed into the suit and fixed his hair. He didn’t style it up in a fancy way, he just brushed it and let his bangs cover his eyes a bit. He picked up his wallet and phone. He opened his bedside drawer and took out his apartment’s keys. After putting on his shoes, he left.

 

He waited for a cab and when one stopped in front of him, he immediately told the driver where to bring him. He sent Baekhyun a text message. He told him he’s sorry for not picking up the phone for he slept the whole day and told him he’s already on his way to the hotel. Baekhyun told him to take care and that they are waiting for him at the entrance.

 

Luhan doesn’t really look forward to what’s going to happen at the party later. Sehun won’t be there anyway. They attended different universities when they were in college, not really minding that they’ll be away from each other because they trust the love they have for each other. Their relationship went smooth for 3 years but on their last year in college, they both became very busy, their on-the-job training both consuming most of their time and energy. Their fight occurred frequently and they experienced sleeping with a heavy heart. After that, not being able to withstand the situation anymore, they broke up. Both of them having a fair share of fault in the situation.

 

Luhan sighed upon remembering the things he tried forgetting for years. He misses the good times - every time spent with Sehun.

 

He arrived at the venue 15 minutes later and his friends are already at the entrance, waiting for his arrival. He paid the driver and went out of the cab and was immediately hugged by the overly hyper Baekhyun.

 

“Luhannie,” he squealed, “I’m glad you came” he then started peppering Luhan’s face with kisses and Luhan turned to look at Chanyeol, mouthing the words ‘help me?’ to which the latter only shook his head and mouthed ‘he missed you, I wouldn’t dare’ back.

 

After who knows how long of being attacked by Baekhyun, the latter released him from the hug and grinned at him, “you, there’s something different about you tonight”

 

“Oh, there is? It’s my usual look, maybe you’re hallucinating, you’re hungry already?” Luhan chuckled as a reply

 

“Maybe, but there is really something new to you tonight. Anyway, let’s go inside, Kyungsoo’s already there, he saved us some seat, Jongin cannot come”

 

“Oh, why?” Luhan asked

 

“His boss called, there’s a VIP visiting their company tonight and he can’t say no. He’s already here when his boss called,” Baekhyun explained.

 

“Kyungsoo must be very disappointed” Luhan commented, worried about how his friend is feeling about being left alone.

 

“Well he is but he’s trying not to show it, he doesn’t want Jongin to worry about him so we have a mission tonight, okay?”

 

“Cheer Kyungsoo up and never let him feel alone”

 

Baekhyun grinned wider at that, Luhan’s starting to be afraid that his cheeks will be torn apart. Baekhyun held his hand and pulled him inside, Chanyeol following behind them. They spotted Kyungsoo easily, an already half-empty champagne flute in his hands, his gaze trained at the pairs on the dance floor.

 

Luhan immediately sat beside him and took the flute in his hands and offered him a calming smile, “hello, Kyungsoo, the night’s still young to be drinking, don’t you think?”

 

Kyungsoo just smiled at him and nodded his head.

 

“Let’s be each other’s date tonight, okay? And you can call Jongin later, I know he’ll like to hear any news from you”

 

“But wouldn’t that be unfair? Me calling him while having fun?” Kyungsoo asked him.

 

“Oh, I’m sure Jongin will like to hear you having fun despite him not being here so you should give him a call” Luhan convinced him.

 

“I guess,” Kyungsoo replied, his left hand rubbing his nape, “where’s Baekhyun and Chanyeol?”

 

Luhan pointed at the dance floor and the couple sure is there, dancing sweetly while their gaze are fixated at each other, an identical smile on their lips.

 

Luhan and Kyungsoo just watched them, all the while munching on the snack served at their table. The lights are dim and the place is adorned with different wallflowers and lanterns hanging. Baekhyun and Chanyeol went back to their table before the porgarm officially started. The program started with their university President giving his message to everyone who attended the reunion and the former student council president from their batch giving his message too. A video was then played. A video of their activities when they were still in the university. Memories of the good time came flashing back and Luhan was smiling the entire time he was watching the video.

 

That was before a certain picture appeared in the video. Luhan remembered that picture well. He remembered the time when that picture was taken very well. He was holding a bouquet and a guy was kneeling on his right knee before him. _Sehun._ It was during the spring festival and Sehun visited their school. They got married that day, at the marriage booth at the school grounds and Luhan cannot contain his happiness during that time.

 

Luhan excused himself and headed to the nearest restroom. He can feel his eyes starting to sting. He felt someone walking behind him, he knows it is Baekhyun. When they reached the restroom, Luhan let his tears flow and Baekhyun just hugged him. After minutes of bawling his eyes out and Baekhyun rubbing his back in an attempt to comfort him, Luhan composed himself up. He washed his tear-stained cheeks and his puffy eyes. He went to get some tissue in the nearest cubicle and blew his nose on it.

 

Baekhyun stared at Luhan, worry evident on his face. He watched as Luhan tidied himself up. Luhan is now fixing his hair and Baekhyun noticed something.

 

“Luhan, did you dye your hair before?” he asked him.

 

A puzzled Luhan turned to look at him. Baekhyun inched closer to Luhan and held the strands of hair that looks very different from the others, “this”

 

Luhan was shocked to see the golden hair stands that Baekhyun is holding. He turned to look at his reflection in the mirror again but it is still there. He blinked his eyes a few times and rubbed his eyes a few time but it was still there - the vibrant color proudly standing out. Luhan rubbed his eyes again, not quite believing what he is currently seeing. His strands of golden hair has now appeared. After 32 years of being alive, the golden strands is now there. He rushed out of the restroom and exited the function hall, not paying a glance to the shouting Baekhyun. He needs to go back at the bus stop. He has a feeling that the person responsible for the appearance of his golden hair strands is there, and unconsciously waiting for him too. He needs to get there quick. He immediately hailed a cab upon setting foot outside the prestigious hotel. Catching his breath and a hand placed over his hand and the other clutching his chest, he told the driver where to take him.

 

His heart is beating loudly in his chest. It’s pounding too strong that Luhan’s afraid it might get out of his chest anytime now. Upon reaching the department store, Luhan immediately paid for the ride and went out, not even bothering to get his change.

 

Luhan rushed towards the pedestrian lane, his gaze wandering around and he saw Sehun sitting on one of the benches at the other side of the street, under the centennial tree that is adorned with Christmas lights and lanterns hanging on its branches. Sehun looked ethereal that time and Luhan felt the need to be in his presence that instant. He mindlessly crossed the street upon seeing him, not noticing that the sign is on red. A loud honk was heard afterwards and Luhan felt his world stopped when he saw a car speeding towards him.

 

****

 

“Mom, I’m going out” Sehun shouted the moment he woke up. It was already 5 pm that time. He was busy staring at his reflection in the mirror when he noticed that there’s something off with his hair. It was disheveled, considering that he just got out of bed, so some of his hair are sticking out and there are this noticeably different hair strands sticking out. They are of different color. They all have that golden shade. Remembering what it meant, Sehun fixed himself up. He took a quick bath and got dressed in not ime. 15 minutes after, he’s already heading out of the house - the bus stop being his destination.

 

 _He will be there,_ Sehun told himself, _I have this strong feeling that I will find him there, just like how I found him yesterday, he will be there._

He hailed a cab and arrived at the bus stop 20 minutes after. He let his gaze wander around the place, searching for the doe-eyed boy he still love. After minutes of searching, he still didn’t see him so he opt to sit on the nearest bench and just wait for the next hours. He’ll wait, no matter how long it takes, he will wait. After an hour of waiting, Luhan still haven’t arrived.

 

Sehun rubbed his freezing palms together and started stomping his feet. It was right then when he heard a loud honk and tires screeching. He turned his gaze on the street and there he saw Luhan, standing frozen in the middle of the pedestrian lane, a car barely missing him.

 

“Luhan!” he shouted and he immediately rose to his feet. He sprinted towards Luhan and pulled the boy close to him. Luhan is shaking and he immediately clung onto Sehun. Sehun immediately said sorry to the driver who was kind enough to not shout at Luhan unlike any other driver out there. He picked Luhan up and carried him to the bench he was sitting on earlier. He tried putting Luhan down but Luhan wouldn’t budge and just hold onto him tighter so he is left with no choice but to situate the shaking boy on his lap as he rub his back smoothly.

 

“You’re an idiot, do you know that?” Sehun asked him, Luhan just nod his head.

 

“Why aren’t you looking at the signs? What if something bad had happened to you? What if that car hit you? I just found you again, I’m not ready to lose you again, Lu, you pabo” Sehun nagged at him, his voice breaking.

 

“I’m sorry, I’m really sorry, Sehun-ah,” Luhan mumbled, “I just want to be with you again so I ran when I saw you, I’m afraid you’ll be gone if I didn’t” he replied, soft sobs escaping his lips.

 

“Shh, it’s okay, it’s okay, you’re here with me now, I’m here now, I will not be leaving you, never again” Luhan lifted his head upon hearing that, his watery orbs staring into Sehun’s emotional ones. Sehun flashed him a comforting smile and Luhan felt his heart beating faster. He’s drowning, and he doesn’t mind, as long as it’s Sehun he’s drowning into.

 

“I know I should have said this 10 years ago and it’s already overdue, but I’m sorry, Sehun. I’m sorry for the things I said to you before. I didn’t mean every word that I said. I know I shouldn’t have said those things. I was wrong. I shouldn’t have told you that I didn’t deserve you because it was me who doesn’t deserve you. I’m sorry, Sehun-ah” Luhan told Sehun, his eyes welling with tears.

_Sehun-ah._ The name echoed in Sehun’s mind. He missed hearing Luhan calling him that. He missed everything they had lost just because they were too young and too naive.

 

“Hey, it’s okay, it’s all in the past, Lu. Why dwell on it when we can start anew? We’re soulmates after all” Sehun warmly told him.

 

“You just got your golden hair strands too?” Luhan asked him.

 

“Yes, I got it because you came back into my life again, my Xiao Lu”

 

“I missed you calling me that” Luhan confessed.

 

“Well, are you ready to hear that nickname again starting today, for the rest of you life, my little deer?” Sehun asked him, grinning.

 

Luhan just nod his head and hes tarted inching his face closer to Sehun, “10 years, and you’re still the reason for this fleeting feeling and for the fluttering of my heart, Sehun-ah, I love you” Luhan stated, his heart swelling with too much emotions - adoration, happiness, comfort, contentment and love- all because of being in Sehun’s presence, all because of being with Sehun.

 

“10 years and you’re still good at driving me crazy, Xiao Lu. Wo ai ni” Sehun inched his face closer, letting his lips touch Luhan’s.

 

 

_Some people live their live in full bliss - a life full of glitters and golds, sparkles and shines. Some people live their lives in pains and sufferings - a hand on their neck, razors on their wrists, and their future blurry. Some live their lives in full regrets - an endless feeling of anguish, an endless cycle of blaming themselves, wondering about things that could have been and should have happened, the if onlys and what ifs._

_And now, after finding each other again after years of being spearated, Sehun and Luhan’s lives will be the former._

_*** END ***_


End file.
